circus freak

i would have thought i’d known by now

how to move with strings

tied to my wrists like a violin bow

wrung around clipped wings

our show begins at the gathering dusk

the puppeteer gets to work

i enter stage right – an empty husk

of a woman lost in the cirque

raise the curtains! the puppeteer says

act one shall now commence

i dance and dance in pairs of pairs

– an act of violence

they’re watching me, i know they are

like a whispering circus campaign

they place their bets, they go too far

still i stand and dance again

i stand and sit i stand and sit

so immaculate is this game

at the end of the show, i stand and sit

and the puppeteer calls again

i lie awake and now i see

the word ‘disinfect’ in front of me

i blink my eyes, the puppeteer glees

and lights up the marquee